Tag Archives: motivation

Butterfly.

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Tough life. Life is tough. One moment it’s easy, but you’ve forgotten to balance. Balance your friends with your cheque book, balance your studies with your beau. Balance everything.

So you wake up one day with an emerging epiphany, or is that just another grey hair? You think, I need to be better. I need to be more than I was yesterday. I need to prove to myself, to the world, that I know how to have an easy life. I possess the organization, the skills to balance. To be whole.

And you try for the next 24 hours to be on top of things. You say hello and goodbye. You eat quick, and think much faster. You make your bed, you wash your clothes, you say goodnight.

You saw very little. Your friend was in need of comfort, but you had no time. Your food was not savored, your bed was unwelcoming. Your dreams lacked spontaneity, no escape from your perfect world. You balanced everything, and lost more.

You walk around proud of your achievements. Of your ability to do what makes you thrive. But you feel alone, you crave attention, you try to be perfect but perfection isn’t perfect.

You have these wings that emerge when you do something for yourself, something that changes you. You fly to the comfort of the collective, as they fly to you. To follow the standard approach, to organize your chaos, to streamline your mistakes to reach avoidance. You are hiding those wings that take you to new places.

I wanted to be normal. You wanted to be normal. But normal isn’t perfect. Normal lacks creativity, the term is stagnant. Live in constant flux, never pausing, always seeking new lessons, new experiences. You will find a passion for something that you hadn’t thought twice about before, before you hopped under your covers. You love like you live, in a stable manor. But those who love most, feel most, see hearts collide, beating. Be jealous of the free birds, not the nested ones.

A.

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Brave.

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Making Changes.

Being naturally skinny is easy. Easy to eat what you want, exercise when you want, and not have to worry about gaining weight. I  was always tiny in high school and I thought being skinny was an achievement…it’s really not.

You don’t have to work for anything. You wake up in the morning and effortlessly you’re happy with your body. How is that fair?

I played sports a lot, so I was fit to some extent – not because I wanted to

be, but rather as a side effect. I remember my brother told me one day, “You’re going to hit 21 and realize you’re not going to be skinny forever.” Mind you, he’s had to work very hard for the body he has…both of my brothers have. I use that statement, and their progress, as my inspiration. They didn’t get what they wanted by sitting around, so why should I? I look in the mirror and I’m happy with myself…but I want to be proud.

Now I’m 21, and I need a lot of time to think.  I started going to the gym with a friend who knows how to do basically everything. He’s really helped me enjoy the gym, learn the machines, keep myself from getting injured. 3 weeks, 5 days a week., soccer on the weekends. A lot of time in my day to think, while I do good for my body. And trust me, seeing the changes, the tone come back, the muscle building…that’s a thrill. It’s exciting, for once in my life, to be consciously putting effort into my body that I can be proud of. Same with food. I’m more conscious of my intake to ensure I don’t lose weight. No more pepsi every day, less fast food, protein after the gym, and eating meals on time. I’m not going to be skinny forever,

as we age, so do our bodies. But as I age, I want to know how to keep the body I have and not settle for what life hands me. I will do what I want.

I want to hike a mountain without being unable to move the next day. I want to join my friends in kayak journeys, without my arms falling off. I want to play mid-field in soccer to test my cardio. I want to feel like I can do things.

Just goes to show that nothing worth having was ever achieved without effort.

A. 

Fit.


Waiting for Superman.

“The way she smiles.”

I want someone to notice that. Not my cleavage. Not my mini skirt. I don’t want to judge them in the same, degrading way. Muscles, jawline, attire. I walk into a club and I see faces…bodies…so disconnected.

Everyone judges the surface. I believe I have more below the surface to offer and so do most. I can’t stand the thought of wanting to meet someone based solely on their looks. I want to know more…

When you were 5, who was your biggest inspiration? When you fall asleep at night, what’s the last thing you think about? Do you bike, ski, run? Are you Conservative or Liberal? Happy or sad? Where are you in your life right now? Do you say you are a truthful person? How many glasses of water do you drink a day? I bet you forget to floss daily.

And I want them to know more about me…

My biggest inspiration were my parents. I constantly think about my future before I shut my eyes. I play soccer, I dance unprofessionally in my room and shower, and I’m open to doing more. Neither, NDP all the way. Happy, most of the time. I’m not quite sure where life will take me, but I’m sure of myself so that’s ok. I lie, but I know my limits – I am truthful to those I care about. I don’t count, but I probably should. Hey. You’re not my dentist…are you?

I make it sound so easy. But it’s not. It’s much easier to see a face and make assumptions. To settle for not knowing. If the world were blind, maybe we would learn to appreciate the meaning of words. Maybe we’d strike up a few extra conversations throughout our day. Listen to our bodies, accept our feelings, and love with our hearts.

In a world filled with disconnect, we find ourselves waiting for our hero. True…I’m waiting for my superman.

…But I hope I have the strength and courage to stop waiting and be a hero myself.

A.

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Reminder.

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Living.

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Care.

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